PELOSI/IMPEACHMENT HELD HOSTAGE BY CORPORATE DEATH THREAT
Many Democratic Party loyalists have felt betrayed by Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi's decision to "take impeachment off the table." Now, an insider at a major arms industry corporation has provided an explanation for Pelosi's decision. According to the insider, who claims he would be murdered himself if he did not speak ON CONDITION OF ANONYMITY, the corporations comprising the Military Industrial Complex threatened Pelosi with death if she did not withdraw her pre-election threat of impeachment.
The insider stated that the private corporate army owned by the Big Military corporation contacted Pelosi surreptitiously and reminded her of what happened to Senator Paul Wellstone and his family. According to ON CONDITION OF ANONYMITY, the Wellstones were murdered because the Senator opposed the Bush build-up to the attack on Iraq. According to an insider, operatives from the private army altered the automatic pilot on Wellstone's plane causing it to crash into a mountain.
Operatives of the corporate private army are well aware that the Speaker travels by jet regularly from DC to her home in Northern California. According to the insider, these operatives have assured the Speaker that they would bomb a commercial flight or a private flight in order to kill the Speaker. The insider reports that the billions of dollars being siphoned off by military corporations and their private armies constitute a powerful incentive to "do whatever it takes" to continue to control the military budget and to promote endless wars against "terrorism."
BUSH OFFICIALS SODOMIZE AMERICA, CAN'T RECALL
A highly placed official in the Bush White House has disclosed On Condition of Anonymity the existence of videos showing the top Bush administration officials forcing anal intercourse on a bound and gagged America. According to the official, the video shows Rove, Cheney, Gonzales, Wolfowitz, Fielding, Rumsfeld, and Bush himself all sodomizing the helpless America, naked and bruised. The official stated that Condoleeza Rice is seen sodomizing the whimpering victim with a strap-on dildo. The official stated that the video shows highlights of the gang rape of America that took place in regular White House orgies.
Rumors about the existence of the video have circulated in Washington recently. Apparently these rumors sparked committees of both houses of Congress to subpoena testimony. The White House insisted the hearings be held behind closed doors. When asked under oath in a secret hearing if he had sodomized America, the official reported that Donald Rumsfeld told the committee, "I have no recollection of ever having anal intercourse with America." Alberto Gonzales, again according to the official speaking On Condition of Anonymiity, told the committee he was "too busy protecting America from her enemies to have had time to sodomize her." When told of the video, which one committee member stated he had a credible witness who had viewed it, Gonzales stated that "Congressional disclosure of such videos gives aid and comfort to America's enemies by politicizing the private acts of consenting adults." According to the official, Senator Arlen Specter asked Attorney General Gonzales to either confirm or deny that he had forced, exteroceptive anal intercourse with America. In secret testimony, Gonzales said, "Senator, I'd like to honestly respond to your question. It's a good question. But, I cannot either confirm or deny something of which I have no recollection, no matter what the video shows."
